can we please have a moment of peace?

Semester Break started yesterday.
A group of friends (Narvin, Amanda, Sherisse, Christopher, Sasha, Mosie) and I went to Maracas Beach after PBL ended at noon. We nearly didn't go at all, because they were taking sooooo long to decide if they were going, and the longer they took, the later it got. Another group of students (Maria, Ravi, Nafees, Roshni and some other people) went kayaking, and my group was trying to decide whether to go to the beach or kayaking. I knew for sure I was only in for beach, I didn't want to go kayaking, and finally I and Sasha and Narvin got the rest to agree so we went beach! :-D It was really good. I hadn't planned to go into the water - I thought I would just go for the drive through the mountains- but when I got there, the sun was hot and the sand was on me so I decided to bathe. The water wasn't the best I have ever seen at Maracas, but it was still really good to bathe in the sea. We went into the water almost as soon as we reached, then we came on the sand and played volleyball for a bit, then bathed again. Afterwards, they had something to eat and we drove back. It was lots of fun.
Now, remember that girl I told you about? Well, I got my sign, and since I went to the beach instead of to the movies, you can guess correctly that the sign was negatory. We were in the same class on wednesday afternoon and she left without even saying hi, so I accept the sign.
And lest you think I'm crying into my teacups. I'm looking on the bright side. What bright side you ask? A year one girl, who I think is really cute, and who my friend has promised to introduce me to :-D
Also, yesterday at the beach, I got to trouble Mosie which is always fun. And which I would not have gotten to do had I been at the cinema.
I guess I sound pretty callous. Well, let's be honest here, me and the girl i was formerly interested in had one or two good moments but nothing deep or long lasting, and I have been in this position alot of times before. When I was younger it used to hurt more, but I've reached the stage where I can accept it and move on. No use crying over spilt milk.
I need to use the time I have during this break to catch up before exams. So far today however, I haven't done anything because I went out with my parents and brother. And that was very cool so I have no regrets. As Geetali pointed out, we don't know how long we are here for or what might happen tomorrow, so we should enjoy every day that we can. I love having the opportunity to spend time with my parents. They are alive and healthy Praise God.
[On a related note: A girl in my class lost her mother yesterday after a long fight with cancer. My prayers, love and sympathies to you Leah. I know you lost your dad a few years ago also. My condolences. I hope you and your family pull through okay.]
Anyway, me and my parents went for a drive down the east coast all the way south, and it was alot of fun.
Still on the thought of unpredictable life: There has already been at least one fatality due to careless driving to start the long weekend.
My view is "people pass on when it is their time; neither sooner nor later" but it is still sad. I empathise with their families.
Finally, if you listen to rap/hip-hop at all, check out Nas & Quan on "Just a moment". It is a really deep song and I like it alot. I have been spinning it almost non-stop for the last week.
Well, take care. I hope you all are healthy and happy and if you are going through rough times, then I pray that God guides you through the choppy waters to safe harbour.
Peace.

work. work. more work. and a pair of jeans

Hey everyone,

Well, I'm tired. That is the main thought going through my head right now.
Also circulating in that vast empty space known as my mind are the triplet ideas :- I have alot of PBL to do; I have to study biochemistry and anatomy for this block; and I have to study Respiration for phase 1B. So basically, I'm swamped and I am afraid of falling asleep. I don't foresee any rest in the near future either. Semester break starts on Friday but I plan to use it to catch up on all the schoolwork I have. Such is the life of a medical student.
One good thing I can look forward to: Phagwa is Sunday, and I love Holi!!!
Bought a new jeans today because the pairs I have been using are in pretty bad shape. It was probably overdue, but I kept thinking that I would wait until I next went to America to shop. The prices in America are not anything too speciall or much lower because the prices down here are pretty good (in fact, I might end up paying more in America) but the good thing is I might have gotten some brands I don't see down here such as Bugle Boy or Wrangler. To be honest, alot of people my age all shop in the same stores : Francis Fashions, Westport and Catwalk, so everyone has more or less the same clothes. By shopping away, I get clothes that are different eg. Route 66 and NWT.
Haven't worked out in a while cause school gets me so tired and I am always rushing towards another deadline. I will have to make up during the long vacation. This will be my last long vacation at least until I graduate, which I why I so badly want to travel this holiday, even though we still are doing our research project, but I told them from early on, IF I PASS MY PHASE EXAMS (and that is the only condition right now, I have to pass those exams) I will be going for a vacation so You all will have to make do without me. They said okay, and I am a good group leader so they shouldn't have any problems with it. Pray for me to do well in my exams okay. I want to travel so badly, and obviously, I want to pass the exams. Even if it is with 51%, I would accept that pass gladly.
So far, I still haven't decided anything re. the girl I wrote about in my last post. I haven't even seen her since then, although I did speak to her on the phone once. But that call didn't really shed any light on anything so I'll wait and see.
Ms. Geetali, just in case you didn't notice I replied to your message about the poems in the comment area of the last post. Feel free to write any thoughts you have about the poems. You may find it hard to understand them because you don't know the background of the poems.
Well, that is all for now. I will go rest for 10 mins more and then I will start my PBL homework.
Keep well.

Here is my situation. I didn't want to post it.... if things don't go well I wouldn't want to look foolish. But, lately I have just been confusing myself thinking about it. So, I'll write it out and maybe things will be clearer in my mind.

There is a girl in my class whom I might be interested in. Notice I said "might". I didn't say I love her, I didn't say I want to spend the rest of my life with her. I just said I might be interested in her.
She is in my research group, and since I am the leader of the group, that has put me in a bit of an awkward position. I can't give her any special treatment, and yet, there have been times when I couldn't come out and be as blunt with her as I perhaps should have been. Apart from that, I have to consider that I can't let things go sour between us because that would impede the functioning of the group and we still have alot of work ahead of us.
She has some quirks that annoy me. She drinks. I don't know how much she drinks but she does drink. And, in case I never mentioned it before - that is a serious problem for me. I don't like alcohol. I don't want a girlfriend who drinks. I have seen too much bad things with alcohol involved. [You have to give the alcohol industry credit though. They do a truly magnificient advertising job. They make alcohol seem so cool in all its forms: beer and wine, cognac and vodka. Sometimes even I am tempted and then I am shocked cause I am firm in my decision not to drink and yet even I have to take a second look at the ads.]
The other thing I don't like is that she will reach late for classes as a rule and then she will leave as soon as the class is done. So, that means that she is never in school if a class isn't on...and that sucks 'cause that is alot of time when I am there, and we could have been spending time.
I also don't think she is the kind of girl who will call me just to say hi! or hear my voice and that's how I am. So, it would be a situation where I would always be calling her. And that's one-sided and I hate that.
So, by now most of you are wondering, well if all that is a problem, why are you wasting my time? Just drop her from your mind and move on.
I wish it were that easy. But, the annoying thing, and this is weird, the annoying thing... is that I think she might actually like me back.
We went to the cinema together, she and I, and it was a good experience. I think we really enjoyed each other's company. Apart from that there have been a few tiny things that lead me to consider, maybe this could be real.
Of course, I could be hallucinating or delusional. I might be seeing things that I want to see. The things I take as signs might be simple coincidence.
I still don't know what I want to do. The only thing I am sure of is that I don't want to summarily dismiss the chance of me and her being more. So, I guess I have no choice but to hang in there and hope that I get a more definite sign soon. Personally, I'm wishing for a skywriter to give me the sign lol.

So...let's see what else is going on...I miss Def Poetry on HBO. I haven't seen that in a while and I really liked it. I hope they start a new season soon. Whenever I do see another episode I might be inspired to try writing another poem. You never know.

Geetali, I'm 21 now. I don't see what the big deal about 21 is personally. All it means is that I am another year older.

Okay, well I guess that is it for now. Today was normal. Nothing out of the ordinary so I don't think it's worth posting up.

Keep well.

Shivee aka. Sagaboy

It's a boy, and he's gorgeous...

Today we went on the second Outreach Visit.
In case I never described this before, what happened was that one of our Comm Health projects this year was to go to a health centre where we were introduced to an expectant mother ie a pregnant lady and we had the oppurtunity to interview her and find out a bit about her background and watch as she was examined by a nurse. We got a lovely young lady named Jiselle. She was articulate and friendly and it was truly very easy to speak with her.
But the first visit was also plagued with logistical troubles.
That visit was in October/November. She gave birth in late November. Today's trip was sort of a follow up. We saw the mother again and asked her some more questions, we saw the baby [who was really really cute] and got to examine the baby a little. Everything went smoothly logistic-wise so that was good.
It was so nice to get to see the baby. He was adorable. And he was active and he was watching all of us and he held my finger. And he smiled for us :-). After the visit I was seriously considering switching my plan from specialising in psychiatry to specialising in paediatrics. Imagine havign your patients be beautiful babies instead of ppl with mental problems. Sounds cool, huh?
I really do want to be a daddy someday. I know I'm not ready yet.....but eventually... . The last time we went, I was amused at how maternal Krishanta was getting, but this time I understand a little better.
Seeing that little boy and how proud his mommy was made my day!

Oh Gosh, do what you have to do. BUT DO IT QUIETLY!!!

Today, Narvin, Christopher, Sasha and I went to Valpark for lunch. On the way back, Christopher and Sasha were sitting in the backseat while Narvin was driving and I was in the passenger seat.
Christopher, I guess, started feeling frisky - after all, after lunch is playtime, isn't it?
So, he started touchin Sasha on her back. And she's his girlfriend so that doesn't bother me at all. More so as they were behind me and out of eyeshot. Sadly, the two of them insisted on talking while he was touching her. And after comments such as "I not used to feeling bone" and "well move lower then and you go find fat" I was forced to ask them to shut up. I got really really unnerved by the whole situation. I don't know why. I watch Cinemax after dark...and they werent anywhere close to there but ugghhhh.... they were giving me the heebie jeebies

by request...

Hi Hi everyone.

Long time, no see huh?
I wish I had a nice reason for not updating before now, but I guess I have to blame it on laziness.
The last 3 months have been pretty ordinary.

The big events were:
1. My birthday, Jan 22nd, which went by ultra quietly but it was still good. We went to Tamnak Thai ( restaurant) and the food was good if expensive!
2. We got a new car, a blue Nissan Almera.
3. Me and my group which consists of Keegan, Shiva, Ryan, Nalini, Dillon and Shakti, have been working on the Research Project. The Protocol is due today and I have the copies to submit next to me as I type. There was no rushing which was excellent considering when we started. The only thing is this last weekend I spent alot of time polishing and fixing the final product so that I haven't done much studying.

I think my last block exam went okay but I am still waiting for the marks. This block is 2 weeks old and I am way behind. Exam is in 3 or 4 weeks so I will need to push but that is sort of the Mt. Hope Story, so I'm hoping for the best. This block is Anat intensive and that isnt my strong suit so that I will need to really get cracking.

Speaking of Crack, we have a new PBL tutor named Dr. Shobhit Maruti. He is cool, very different from everyone I have had before. He talks to the students alot which is in contrast to the last tutor, Dr. Mellowes who spoke minimally. Dr. Maruti makes jokes and laughs at them himself..... he's actually quite amusing. Everyone says he gives an easy grade but I don't know. I have a sneaking suspicion he could mark hard if he wanted to so I am still being on the P's and Q's.

Ms. Geetali, I assure you that despite the fact I have not been updating much, I still follow your blog enthusiastically. Thank you for your comment :-) I wasn't sure if you ever swung by here.
Well, I think that will be all for right now. I am presently in school in the comp lab typing this. I will go submit our project protocol and then I will have lunch.

Thank you for reading.

Shivee.